Did you know there is a full pull-out section in the Sacramento News and Review that is devoted to pot advertising? Even more astonishing, I suppose, is the fact the Sacramento Bee now allows medical marijuana ads. I sort of feel like Rip Van Winkle who fell asleep in the 1960s and woke up 40 years later to discover that all of his stoned-out blitherings have come true.
This is stuff every pothead toked and giggled about in jest, yet here it is, a reality. Hash bars, free 1/8ths, U.S. Patents on bud strains. And one dispensary, MediZen, has its own mobile app where you can search for the pot deal of the day. The cost of pot today is outrageous. I was totally shocked. $400 an ounce! That's more than $6,400 for a pound. But the 420 evaluation is only fifty bucks. If you don't qualify, you don't pay, so I imagine everybody qualifies who applies. Unlike those who try to do a HAFA short sale. You might think you are eligible, but many Sacramento homeowners do not qualify. Many short sale sellers don't meet even the basic requirements.
Because I am a Sacramento short sale agent, I did not go to Hempfest '11. I simply do not have the time nor the inclination. But it sounded like fun. Hempfest '11 was a 3-day celebration of all things hemp-like on the marina somewhere in Sutter County. They charged an entrance fee and frisked grandmothers. It sounded like a good place to go to get a buzz, but not for me. Still, I don't begrudge those who do.
Naw, I'm one of those people who would run out the front door and shake her fist, yelling at kids trampling on my lawn. Ay, back in my day, we bought grass in little matchboxes for $10.00. You kids, you don't even know what a matchbox is, what with your butane lighters and blow torches.
My elderly neighbor was complaining a few days ago about the skunks in Land Park. She said the smell is horrific. We have some pretty big skunks in Land Park. The problem is basically my other neighbor who used to trap them has moved to Alaska, and she is renting out her house to a guy who bought one of my listings in South Land Park several years ago. It's a small world in Sacramento. He lost that home to foreclosure. As a tenant, he doesn't care about trapping skunks. Besides, he has a yippy little dog, so skunks probably don't come into his yard.
I told my neighbor that I really don't mind the smell. It smells like skunkweed. I also said that the reason the odor probably bothers her so much is because she does not smoke pot. She's obviously unfamiliar with skunkweed. She looked at me like I just landed here from Mars, but her husband laughed.
I'm wondering, though, if that Sacramento chicken law passes -- and I don't know why it shouldn't -- maybe if we got some chickens, that would keep the skunks out of the yard. What would be really ironic would be to plant our own little cannabis patch behind the garage and then have skunks tear it out. Who am I kidding? I don't even have time to put my dahlias in the ground.
I leave you with this thought: Loudon Wainwright says Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road was once the number one song in Little Rock, Arkansas, for six solid weeks. He says it never made it into the top 10 when he recorded it, and I believe him. That's because it's a stupid song. Smoke some pot and listen to it.
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Certified HAFA Specialist
My Sacramento Real Estate Listings
Elizabeth Weintraub is an author, home buying columnist for The New York Times-owned About.com, a Land Park resident, and a Land Park real estate agent who specializes in older, classic homes in Land Park, Curtis Park, Midtown and East Sacramento. Weintraub is also a Sacramento Short Sale agent who lists and successfully sells short sales throughout the four-county Sacramento area. Call Elizabeth Weintraub at 916.233.6759. Put 35 years of real estate experience to work for you. Broker-Associate at Lyon Real Estate. DRE License # 00697006.
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You're cracking me up!! While I've never heard the song "Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road", as a fairly close neighbor to Little Rock I feel as if I should now get familar with it :-)
It seems to me that Barbara Duncan has posted a few photos of skunks in her yard in Searcy, Arkansas.
Oh Elizabeth, what a long strange trip it's been. That German crowd could've used a couple of kilos before taking on LW's classic. Great way to start the week if only I can get the tune out of my head!
Hey Elizabeth - They actually frisked grandmothers? Shoot, I should drive the van for the gals at the Senior Center. They haven't seen that kind of action since they took their last trip on the airlines and went through airport security:-)
Sorry about the song stuck in your head, Kevin, but it got stuck in mine so the devil made me do it. Yeah, long strange trip.
Hi Mryl: I don't think every grandmother enjoyed being frisked. I'm old enough to be a grandmother, and I'd kick 'em.
Elizabeth, what were you smoking when you wrote this blog? LOL Are you aware that my daughter has relocated to Searcy AR. She missed all the skunk fun, however, and I've been too busy to keep up with my favorite bloggers lately.
Boy, Elizabeth, do we have SKUNKS! My dog got sprayed and various members of my family have come really close in our front yard. Apparently a lady in the neighborhood was feeding them. Can you imagine! Feeding skunks! Anyway, she moved.
And as for the festival... my husband is an ATC... they get drug tested regularly and unexpectedly. He even freaks out when we go to a concert - you know what that's like! Can't you just see him trying not to breathe! Hilarious!
And what's with the joke about Arkansas! My dad's side of the family is from there! LOL
Anyway, sorry for the commentary, but you just struck me as absolutely hilarious today! XOXO
Elizabeth, you are getting better and better with your stand up comedy and I think if you weren't such a darn expert short sale specialist, that is your place. Pot deal of the day, Hempfest, skunks, this is fun reading over here. Keep it up.
Elizabeth - I think I'm still sleeping because I have not seen one single pot ad in my neck of the woods.