Club Chaos Agents - All Things Hollish, Wacked, and Jacked

I used to be an Estee Lauder girl. Devoted to the line. Couldn't wait for Free Gift With Purchase. But I am now a traitor. I have deflected to Chanel. I used to be a huge fan of Chanel Allure. In fact, one of the sentences I practiced over and over in my head when I first visited Paris was how to ask a shop-owner if she carried Chanel Allure and how much it cost. Yet, I never really used Chanel makeup products. All of that changed last week.

An agent in my Lyon Real Estate office also works at Macy's. Her name is Linda Loli. She's a veteran in the Chanel department, and her make-up always looks great. Sometimes I stop to chat with her while I am downtown at Macy's. She suggested I make an appointment to look at Chanel's product line, so I took her up on it. It's been years since I bought a lot of make-up. And let's face it, I'm not getting any younger; what was a good look in my 40s looks rather silly as I approach my 60s.

Linda says Chanel is the best, and I believe her. In comparison, I'd say Estee Lauder is an A-minus. But I wouldn't have downgraded Estee Lauder if I hadn't tried Chanel. It makes a foundation that doesn't dry out my face and is a liquid-based pressed compact. Chanel also makes a lipstick that doesn't come off. No joke. One end of the tube is a stain, which makes your lips feel yucky, but the other end is a sealer, which gives your lips shine and moisture. You can eat lunch, and your lipstick still looks fabulous. It's an incredible product that I've been wanting for years. Rouge Double Intensite, Ultra Wear Lip Colour.

There's a reason I'm mentioning this to you, a parallel coming up. See, yesterday I received a referral call. A previous client had referred a home seller to me. He wasn't trying to do a short sale. The guy wanted to sell his personal residence as a regular seller. About half of my real estate business in Sacramento is regular real estate sales. Because he had equity, he wanted to get the most bang for his buck, meaning the first words out of his mouth were about finding an agent who charges the lowest amount of commission. He almost apologetically explained that he was planning to interview agents, maybe 3 of them, and wanted to know if that approach was OK with me.

Sure, I responded, because after you speak with several other agents, it will be apparent you're not going to find a better Sacramento agent than me. I welcome comparisons. I say this not out of arrogance but because I believe it. I know lots of agents who don't believe this about themselves. To many, the thought of competition is frightening . . . and it often shows, which is why they lose listing presentations.

Then the seller said he wanted to compare commissions and fully intended to choose the listing agent who charged the least. Well, I charge the most. And I told him that. I justify it because I focus on getting my sellers the highest price and providing the best service. I protect my client's interests. Would he rather get $10,000 more for his home or hire an agent who charges him $1,000 less? His choice. I don't throw my clients under the bus.

I'll give you an example. Last week I received a Request for Repair on my East Sacramento listing. The home inspection noted a Zinsco electrical panel and mentioned that some of these electrical panels could be faulty or dangerous. The home inspector suggested the buyer hire a licensed electrician to inspect it. Instead of getting a professional's opinion, the buyer's agent issued a Request for Repair and asked the seller to replace it. I advised the seller to reject the request and asked the agent to get it inspected by a electrician.

Next go around, the agent submitted an invoice in the sum of $1,800 to replace the 100-amp panel with a 200-amp panel. Nope, the seller will not replace the panel nor will the seller upgrade the panel. I didn't ask the agent to send me a bid; I asked for proof that the panel needed to be replaced. Was the panel faulty? Apparently not. The agent could not produce an electrician's report that said the panel was faulty. And by the way, dear buyer's agent, we issued a Notice to Perform yesterday and expect the release of contingencies today. An hour later the contingency release arrived in my email. Matter dropped.

Do you think my seller is sorry that he hired a real estate agent who charges the most? I don't think so. Just like I don't care that Chanel doesn't offer "free gift with purchase." I'd rather pay a fair price for an excellent product without the hype, smoke and mirrors. I suspect my sellers want the same thing.

Photo: Big Stock Photo

One of my favorite streets in Sacramento County is Winding Way in Fair Oaks. Yesterday was the perfect spring day to show homes in Fair Oaks to my doctor client, which meant traveling down Winding Way. It was like driving through a fairy-tale land. The curves and dips of the road added to the scenic beauty. Many fruit trees are in bloom this time of year. Row upon row of flowering trees bordered Winding Way. It was magical.

We looked at four homes. The first was magnificent. Qualify construction throughout: glazed Italian kitchen cabinets, marble entry with columns; each bedroom featured nooks, angles, under-window bench seating, crown molding, an extensive amount of detailing. It was easy to see that the present owners had put a lot of thought into the remodel. The grounds were meticulously maintained, manicured, with rose bushes, fruit trees, and we came upon a bubbling brook beyond the pool.

The second home required a gate code for access. The gate swung open and we were greeted by a boxer, who almost poked his nose through my open car window. I drove past a few homes and stopped at our destination. Because I didn't see a place to park, I left my car on the private driveway, turning to my client to joke, "It's OK; I'm in real estate." He laughed. "I get to park in the middle of the street, too," he said, "Because I'm a doctor." Hey, I did not know that doctors and real estate agents shared a common right.

This home was a bit odd. The dining room flooring was planked wood but the kitchen was laminate and sloped. In fact, the living room floor sloped, too. The view wasn't as inviting as the first home. We didn't make it through the rest of the home but instead navigated our way around the boxer who was waiting at the gate for us, nice doggie, nice doggie, jumped back into my car and headed off down Winding Way.

Some of the homes in Fair Oaks are built as gated communities. Builders picked up 5 to 10-acre parcels, plopped 5 to 7 homes on them, and put a gate around the homes. The third home was one of those. It had half-timbering on a brick exterior, sort of like it couldn't decide whether it was a Tudor or French Normandy or maybe a castle. Across from it sat a Mediterranean monstrosity. The interior was a mix of styles and it had a confusing layout.

One more home to see. This was a newer home built in the early 2000s. The square footage was not pulled from the assessor's records, so I suspected it was smaller than noted. The room sizes were not as grand as the first home, although the waterfall off in the distance reminded me of Lassen Volcanic National Park. Lots of oak trees. I pointed out that the style of the home was a bit too "countrified" for my client. We left. He's probably going to buy the first home.

As we drove through the historic district of Fair Oaks, my client asked about the history of the Fair Oaks chickens. Those chickens have been in Fair Oaks a long time, and I couldn't remember the back story. I know that the chickens and roosters cause a lot of ruckus during outdoor weddings, sometimes crowing very loudly right in the middle of "I do's." So I later Googled it. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, an artist named Hugh Gorman brought 4 chickens to Fair Oaks in 1977, and he eventually released them into the wild. They reproduced, other chickens joined them -- some were Easter escapees from the feed store and some that people abandoned on the edge of town -- and they've been in Fair Oaks ever since.

I have to say that I've got one of the best jobs in the entire world. Who else gets to drive through enchanted lands and tour luxury homes? That experience yesterday was like stepping into a Thomas Kinkade painting. It's a nice break from the stressful day-to-day challenges of selling Sacramento short sales.

Photo: Big Stock Photo

Sometimes I wonder if I'm no better than a Labrador. I might be subject to labrador attention deficit disorder. You know how a dog's attention can suddenly be diverted, right? You're playing with the dog, tossing a ball, when SQUIRREL. The dog's head jerks in the direction of the squirrel, ears up, and you're no longer important.

I am usually working on 2 or 3 different projects when my daily autoprospecting email arrives in the morning around 5 AM. This is a system that shows me every listing that is emailed to my buyers. Pretty soon I'm clicking on the new listings, looking at photos, analyzing the locations, and an hour has gone by. Shiny new listings. I get engrossed. Seduced by hardwood floors and square footage. I can't help myself.

This morning, one of my Land Park short sale listings showed up in my autoprospecting list. This is a beautiful tudor that was remodeled a few years ago. We were about 2 weeks away from short sale approval with Chase Bank when I received an email yesterday from the buyer's agent informing me the buyer was canceling due to health problems. Well, unless she's dying, I don't know why she can't buy the house, but it's not really my concern. My job is to put it back on the market and get it sold again.

The funny thing is I received an email from Chase yesterday. The negotiator said she had good news. She had complained that many of her short sale files were taking too long to approve. So, Chase is now allowing management to approve short sales. The negotiator had 8 on her list that have been sitting since January and now her manager plans to approve all 8, including this one. She promised to send a response in a few days. And now we have no buyer. This is the way life works, though. Yin and yang.

Because the offer we submitted to the bank was higher than the list price of $325,000, we are changing the price in MLS today to $349,000. This is still a terrific bargain for a home in Land Park that last sold for more than $500,000. Ordinarily, if the bank had a problem with the price, I would have heard about it by now. This is a 3 bedroom, 2 bath, built in 1926. It has wood floors, an updated kitchen with granite counters and breakfast nook, remodeled baths, plus a formal dining room with built-ins. There is a partial basement, attic and a bonus room off the garage. It has newer AC and a very pretty covered patio for entertaining.

1000 Fremont Way, Sacramento, CA 95818, offered exclusively by Lyon Real Estate as a short sale at $349,000. MLS #90085352.

Call your Land Park agent, Elizabeth Weintraub, for more information at 916 233 6759.

Photos: Big Stock Photo and Elizabeth Weintraub

Due to my high visibility online as a Sacramento short sale agent, I receive a lot of email spam, much of it centering on short sales. When I received an email from Program 3648, I deleted it, and all those that came after it. I mean, who calls itself Program 3648 -- is this the X-Files?

But on Wednesday, I stopped to read one of these emails. The email aroused my suspicions because it talked about Administration Policy and promised full commissions on short sales, while naming a bunch of major lenders. I know that full commission is an impossible guarantee. Red flag. I also noted the email was absent a company name but sported a Washington, D.C. address, made to look like it could be a government-sponsored entity. #2 red flag.

So, I decided to check it out and signed up for the Program 3648 webinar. It started out innocent enough. To qualify for the program, an agent must:

• Be full-time
• Have short sale experience
• Be able to handle at least 15 short sale listings
• Possess a proactive approach
• Maintain a proper mindset

That last 2 requirements were a bit peculiar because every successful short sale agent I know has those qualities. To push a "proactive approach" or "proper mindset," well, those are not things one would promote to an experienced real estate agent. It's insulting. But it's new information to an inexperienced agent. #3 red flag.

Program 3648 also sports a little icon as its logo. It looks suspiciously like a government symbol with an eagle in the middle and lettering so tiny you can't read it, but it's not a government entity. #4 red flag.

Basically, this is how the program was laid out. An agent pays an upfront fee, signs a 6-month contract and agrees to pay a triple-digit monthly fee to Program 3648. In return, the agent receives training on how to become a short sale listing agent . . . Wait. Didn't they just say they wanted experienced short sale agents? #5 red flag.

The agent will receive a list of 150 leads. These leads consist of homeowners who are 30 days or more behind in their mortgage payments. If an agent wanted to find a list of homeowners who have a Notice of Default filed against their homes, this information is available for free in the Sacramento County public records. The idea is agents then call or send direct mail to the homeowners, in essence, the program purports to turn real estate agents into telemarketers. #6 red flag.

What busy and successful short sale agent would want to do telemarketing? Probably none. But a brand new agent who has no business might be tempted to sign up for this program.

Program 3648 also provides all the short sale negotiation for the agent. Gosh, I hope Program 3648 is a licensed real estate broker because only real estate brokers or lawyers can collect a commission, regardless of what they call it, to negotiate a short sale.

But the weird twist is the listing agent somehow charges the short sale buyer 1% of the sales price and makes the buyer pay its negotiation fee, 20% of which is rebated to the listing agent. Why would a buyer agree to pay a commission of 1% to the listing agent and the listing agent's third-party negotiator? #7 red flag.

I disconnected at that point. How many red flags does an agent need? I can already hear the lawyers at Lyon Real Estate having conniption fits over this.

Photo: Big Stock Photo

Lyon Real Estate always puts on a great annual awards ceremony. Even during a time when many real estate brokerages are hurting financially, closing up their doors, Lyon still takes care of its agents. Granted, yesterday's awards ceremony was not on par with the Cirque du Soleil act we enjoyed a few years ago, but it was still enjoyable.

They opened the presentations with a video, based on our theme of Winter Olympics. The Olympic flame was passed from one office to another, and we got to see our office mangers prancing through cubicles and running down sidewalks carrying a flaming torch. I didn't know every manager, but then I believe we have 15 branch offices in the Sacramento area. When the video finished, Lyon Real Estate's CEO Mike Lyon and President Jean Li entered the ballroom of the Radisson, arms held high, each clutching a flaming torch. They ran the perimeter, sprinted up the podium and lit the bowl on fire.

While everybody was laughing and applauding, I was wondering where in the world do you find a flaming torch? I mean, is there a store that sells Olympic torches? Or do you have make your own? What if you accidentally set something on fire? We have a very creative marketing team at Lyon Real Estate.

Then the awards ceremony began. Shortly after he handed out a few awards, Mike Lyon surprised the crap out of me. He said the next award was Best Improved Overall, #1 in Closed Units. It was given to the agent whose closed transactions in 2009 most improved over 2008. Now, 2008 was a tough year for many agents. The number on the screen showed that this agent had closed 19 transactions in 2008. I heard agents gasp. I guess that's a good number when you figure that about 85% of all the agents in Sacramento don't even close one transaction every two months, or 6 a year.

However, when I saw the number on the next screen, my heart skipped a beat. It said this agent had closed 43.5 transactions in 2009. Were they talking about me? I figured that I would rank high in the company, but I had no idea that I would be awarded Best Improved Overall, #1 in Closed Units. They keep this stuff a secret until the awards ceremony. But there was my name on the screen. OK, I am so NOT going to cry. Besides, this isn't the Oscars. (Hey, there's a theme for next year.) Do not cry, do not cry. Somehow, I made it up and back to my seat. No tears.

I also picked up an award for ranking in the Top 10% of all Lyon Real Estate agents. That brings my total awards to three for 2009. Gosh, the way 2010 is going, I imagine I'll rank even higher for this year. I wonder if all of this hoopla matters to the public? Probably not. I think buyers and sellers of homes in Land Park and those short sale sellers throughout Sacramento simply care that their agent is efficient, honest and gets the job done.

So, I grabbed my awards and sneaked out the back door. After all, I had a closing for a home in Land Park in an hour. Better put my nose back to the grindstone. Party over.

Photos: Best Overall Improved, #1 Closed Units in 2009, Lyon Real Estate, Elizabeth Weintraub, by Adam Weintraub.

Top 10% at Lyon Real Estate in 2009, Elizabeth Weintraub, by Adam Weintraub

The last time I won a third-place prize, I was probably about eight. Somewhere, I have an old newspaper. My mother was an editor in the 1950s at the Circulating Pines, which was a local newspaper in a suburb of Minneapolis. She put a story and a photo of my brother and me on the front page. I am holding in my lap a long-haired black cat named Spittsboo, sitting on the front steps of our childhood home in Circle Pines, Minnesota, next to my brother. He is holding a salamander on his shoulder.

I placed third in a pet contest. Well, it was actually my cat, not me, who placed third in a division for longest-haired cat. My cat didn't have to do anything except sit there to win. My brother's salamander won first place in the reptile division. That lizard didn't have to do back flips or jump through a flaming hoop of fire to win, either. I'm pretty sure the thing just sat on my brother's shoulder.

I mention this because yesterday I was given an office award at my office meeting for ranking among the top 3 agents in sales for 2009. My office in Midtown Sacramento has 80 or 90-some real estate agents. I didn't enter this contest. It's something that Lyon Real Estate does. It recognizes its top producers every year. My sales production generally ranks among the top 15 agents in my office -- some kind of benchmark Lyon uses -- but since I don't rate myself by comparing myself to other agents, I never really paid much attention to which agent wins what award.

So, it was a surprise when my name was announced and I was handed the award. I considered not writing about it because lots of agents in my office and elsewhere in Sacramento did not fare very well last year. It was a down year for many real estate agents. The market in 2009, like the past 4 years, was dominated by foreclosures, short sales, investors and first-time home buyers, which left a lot of agents out in the cold. The Internet also pushed some agents out of the business because they refused to embrace online technology.

While it is painful to see agents who are suffering, I've decided that my empathy for them should not overshadow the fact I enjoyed an outstanding year in 2009. It's quite an honor to receive such an award. On the other hand, I didn't compete for it or enter a contest. I just did my job, which is primarily selling homes in Land Park and representing sellers of Sacramento short sales.

This afternoon, Lyon Real Estate is hosting its Annual Awards Ceremony at the Radisson. The theme is . . . dum, dum, dum . . . The Winter Olympics. My office is supposed to represent Cross Country Skiing. I guess I could wear a mink hat and go as a spectator. No, on second thought, I should probably wear a wool hat and some sort of spandexy outfit, which I don't have in my wardrobe. I'm likely to win something at this awards ceremony, but it's been hush-hush, like our office awards. I don't want to appear ungrateful, but I am not planning to dress up like an Olympic athlete. But hey, it doesn't mean that I don't support those who do or that I am not a team player.

Hmmm, on reflection . . . maybe it does.

Oh, well. Rebels make good real estate agents, don't you think? We buck the system. Write our own rules. We're independent and don't blend well into the shadows.

After the awards ceremony, I am meeting a buyer who is closing on a home in Land Park. We're going to sign loan docs at my office and complete our final walk-through. At least my hair won't be messed up from wearing a wool hat.

Photo: Adam Weintraub

Some mornings it's difficult to select one topic to write about. That's because so many things happen to this Sacramento short sale agent in one day. Since I generally write about my previous day's experiences, to pick just one situation is hard. I don't have time to write another book.

Do I write about the agent who sent me an offer on a short sale and included a copy of an earnest money deposit check dated in January? When I see red flags like that, I check my Supra website to see if the agent had even shown the property. Nope. When I asked the agent to promise in writing that the agent will not write any other offers for the buyer and will withdraw outstanding offers upon seller's acceptance, per the seller's instructions, the agent hesitated, saying the buyer would like to view the home one more time.

Yeah, right. It would be a good idea for the buyer to eventually view the home.

Or maybe I should write about the potential seller with a Wachovia short sale situation, who, for some reason, needed to put a home in Sacramento on the market immediately? This seller requested listing paperwork, which I prepared and emailed. The seller had refinanced the home and was most likely mortgaged over basis. When I suggested to the seller that tax advice was very important and to call an accountant for such advice, I was shot down and pretty much told to mind my own business.

Which I decided to do by not working with that seller. Good idea to mind my own business.

There was also the seller who wanted to do a short sale on a rental because the negative cash flow was never ending. The seller felt that continuing to make mortgage payments every month was a huge financial drain on resources. The rental is a condo in Sacramento. When I inquired about the status of the homeowner's association payments, the seller hadn't made a payment for almost two years. Well, the bank is unlikely to pay those delinquent HOA dues. I asked if the seller was making more money in 2010 than at the time of loan origination. Affirmative.

So, there is disposable income then? All of a sudden, the seller switched gears and retracted that statement. The words of Hugh Laurie from that TV show HOUSE entered my head: Everybody lies.

There are only so many hours in a day. It was more important that I work on bringing two short sale banks to an agreement over a seller contribution through a mutual compromise. Equally important that I get an extension and postponement of trustee's sale on another pending short sale escrow. And extremely important that I get MGIC to back-off on its unreasonable demands and let the seller's bank approve the short sale like it wants to do.

Not to mention, I have to occassionally stop what I'm doing and pet the cats. My cats don't lie to me.

Photo: Big Stock Photo

Hardly a day goes by that I don't receive an email from some frustrated short sale buyer asking me for advice on some transaction that I'm not involved in. Most of the scenarios are as follows: The buyer has been in escrow for months, waiting for approval, and nothing seems to be happening. They feel helpless, stymied, stonewalled and disheartened.

I know how short sale buyers feel, which is one of the reasons that as an experienced Sacramento short sale agent, I stay on top of my transactions. Not only do I post daily progress reports on my website that my sellers, our buyers' agents and their buyers can read, but I try to send important advancements to the buyers' agents as they happen. Of course, I can't force the buyers' agents to pass on this information to their buyers, but I hope that they do.

See, short sale buyers are an important aspect to any short sale transaction. They are paramount. Without a dedicated buyer, there is no deal. They are a precious commodity who deserve to be treated with respect and handled delicately. Expectations need to be managed. It's very difficult for buyers to wait two, three, four months or longer for short sale approval.

But a buyer has no control over a short sale. None. Buyers can't speak with the seller's short sale bank nor can their agent. Only the listing agent controls the short sale transaction and pulls the strings. If that listing agent has no short sale experience or doesn't routinely follow up with the short sale bank, a buyer can be in for a long wait. In fact, it may never close, especially if complications arise.

Buyers don't see any of these things. What a buyer sees is a home the buyer wants to purchase. Hopefully, that buyer is in contract with the seller, and the listing agent has experience selling short sales. If not, that buyer is at the mercy of an inexperienced short sale agent, hoping for a miracle. That's a sad and sorry place to be. My heart goes out to them.

Photo: Big Stock Photo

At a young age, my father taught me three important things about life. How to bluff my way through a poker hand, catch fish by using a pole, line, bobber, hook and bait, and how to keep my head above water while swimming. In the case of the latter, he threw me out of the boat in the middle of the lake and told me to swim or drown. For added measure, he dumped our dog into the water. I didn't say he was a nice man.

Do you know what happens when you're in the water with a dog? The dog isn't stupid. It will head for the nearest rock, which may happen to be you. Obviously, I survived, though, or I wouldn't be typing this blog.

All three of these things have helped me to become a better real estate agent and a skilled Sacramento short sale agent. Through fishing, I have learned patience, although there are those people such as my husband who may disagree with that statement. When I take a listing, it's a lot like fishing. I throw that baited line into the Internet, jiggling the line a little to attract attention until some buyer or buyer's agent calls me, nibbling at the bait. When I get a bite, I know how to strike and land that fish.

I play poker every day -- whether it's negotiating a seller contribution on a short sale, navigating a Request for Repair issue or helping first-time home buyers snag that great deal. The negotiation aspect of real estate is my favorite. Maybe that's because I'm good at it, and people in general tend to gravitate toward activities at which we excel. You'll rarely hear a person say, "Oh, I really suck at that so I think I'll continue to be a failure." Except maybe George Bush. Most people realize their limitations and choose professions where they will succeed or at least have a glimmer of hope at success.

This last week I closed 3 transactions for extremely delighted clients. One was a bank-owned home in which I represented the buyer and the escrow company was in southern California. Southern Cal escrow companies handle transactions differently than they do in northern California. I used to be an escrow officer in Orange County back in the 1970s. When I reviewed the buyer's estimated closing statement, I found glaring errors which, through persistence, were finally deleted.

On top of that, the bank refused to approve the final HUD. Turns out the bank had to pay another $3,000 toward bank HOA dues, which was unexpected. When the escrow closing date ran past 2 weeks with little resolution in sight, I suggested that the buyer sign a Demand to Close escrow. We gave the bank 5 days to close or the buyer reserved the right to sue. That did the trick. The bank closed. That was a small commission check based on a $62,000 sales price.

My second closing was a Sacramento short sale in which I represented the seller. I made up for that previous small commission by selling this home for $435,000. Lawyers were negotiating this short sale and, at one point, had reached a wall. The short sale bank refused to budge on its unreasonable demands. I made a few suggestions to the law firm and bingo, the short sale was approved.

Then, yesterday, I closed a Sacramento short sale on a halfplex for $65,000. This involved two short sale lenders who were at odds with each other. We had been in escrow for 6 months with a cash buyer. The banks squabbled over the line-item fees on the HUD-1, all the usual stuff that makes short sales sometimes drag on. But the parties hung in there, and we closed. I called the seller to congratulate him yesterday. He said something that made me think.

He said I handled that small transaction like it was a million-dollar deal. The seller is a licensed real estate agent, so he understands that we are paid our commissions based on the sales price. See, the thing is I love what I do and have a passion for real estate. It's challenging, interesting and fun. I'd do it for a hobby if I wasn't paid for it. I don't handle my transactions based on the money I will make. Each deserves my full concentration and effort.

And I'm very lucky that I picked up 3 talents very early in my life. Knowing how to swim, even though I learned the hard way, has prepared me to face just about any kind of obstacle that I'll run into. They say that which doesn't drown you, makes you a better person. Poker involves strategy, coupled with a bit of calculated risk, but the rewards are worthwhile, especially if one knows when to fold them. As for fishing, I have many bobbers with bait dangling on the hooks scattered all over my online lake.

So tell me, what did you learn as a child that has helped you to become a better person?

Photo: Big Stock Photo

The problem for gardeners who live in places like Minneapolis is they are pretty much limited to pursuing their passion for only a few months out of the year. My love of gardening is one of the reasons I bought a home in Land Park, Sacramento, all those years ago. Living in Land Park means I don't have to grow seedlings on my dining room table for 12 weeks nor ruin the surface of said table. (Note to self: I still need to buy a new dining room table.) Living in Land Park means I can, for example, plant peas directly into the ground. Spring starts in February in Sacramento.

Hyacinths are one of the first signs of spring. When I lived in Minneapolis, it used to give my heart a glimmer of hope, spotting hyacinths emerging through the snow, poking up their little heads after a long, cold and harsh winter. Hope that spring would eventually arrive in another 3 to 4 months. A spring hyacinth was a sign that winter was coming to an end.

I planted hyacinths in our Land Park gardens when we moved here. Some of you may recall the blog about replacing my lawn in Land Park. We tore out the rose garden last fall when we laid our new sod and planted a maple tree in place of the garden. However, I do not distinctly recall having a conversation with the landscaping guys about the flower bulbs that were planted in that garden bed. You know where I'm going with this, right?

Yup, hyacinths are coming up in the middle of our lawn! The landscaping guys have mowed right over them. I noticed them when I hauled our trash cans out to the curb late yesterday afternoon. And that's not the worst part. The worst part is there were more bulbs in that garden. Some were planted deeper than the landscaping guys were probably digging. I haven't seen the tulips yet, but I bet the gladioli will poke through the lawn in July. Yikes.

As I yakked with callers on my Bluetooth, I grabbed a spade and started digging. In no time, my knees were soggy from the wet lawn. My fingernails had dirt under them, and I chipped my polish. Other Land Park agents wonder how I get so many things done while working all the time. This is how. Sometimes, I multitask.

Photo: Big Stock Photo